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Ubisoft continue to taunt me with giant, powerful girlsBigly
Bigly
A while ago I commented onthe hugeness, and powerful auras, of the womeninAssassin’s Creed Odyssey’sgodly DLC. And their hugeness was only a step up from Kassandra, already a big hench mercenary girl about a foot taller than any other human that dared to look at her.
Then they brought outAssassin’s Creed Valhalla, a Viking epic starring Eivor, who is a blonde giantess with massive boots who kicks over tables and won’t put up with literally anything from literally anybody. And now, there isImmortals Fenyx Rising, which sprung its massive god women on me without any warning. I am starting to suspect that the Anvil engine became sentient in the last few years and if you don’t put a certain number of giant ladies in your game it just stops working and sulks - in which case the Tom Clancy series is about to get really awesome.
(This article has some spoilers for Immortals, but they are mostlyvisual).
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The gods explode into magical hugeness in a cool cutscene where they basically spin themselves out of the raw firmament of the universe. Constellations glimmer in the folds of their robes. They are not made of star stuff, they are made of actual stars, and those stars are permanently done with your shit.
They’re also right next to each other in your temple, so whenever Ares starts talking at them, even though they don’t really like each other that much, they look like they’re exchanging expressions of preternatural boredom.
I actually like Ares, he’s funny and he goes on an emotional journey, and his best friend is a bear. But you can’t tell me that this image:
Does not have the exact same vibe asthisimage:
Source image credit: David Wilkinson
