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Disappearing penises among Cyberpunk 2077’s many launch bugsThough some players can’t make their dicks go away
Though some players can’t make their dicks go away
Cyberpunk 2077is out.Cyberpunk 2077is buggier than an ant farm. If you’ve played it yourself it’s entirely possible you’ve come across some sort of graphical glitch, crash, or strange wardrobe malfunction. Fortunately, new graphic cards drivers can help with some issues on PC, though players are still reporting a whole lot of glitchiness elsewhere - including crashes, broken level decorations,stuck missions, and even disappearing penises.
First up, the serious stuff. Some Cyberpunk 2077 players are reporting crashes. For some it’s on startup, while others are having the game closeafter just a few minutes of playing. A few players have said thatswapping out hardware like RAMhas fixed their crashing, while others are still having issues even onhigher performance hardware. General game performance is similarly all over the place, with reports that even changing the graphics settings from between ultra and lowisn’t helping with framerate drops.
And now a PSA: download the latestNvidiaorAMDdriver update if you haven’t already. Running the game without these seems to be causing players all sorts of strange issues, like making teeny tiny trees show up in places they just shouldn’t be.
I knew Cyberpunk 2077 was going to be glitchy but I did not expect my entire game to be covered with tiny treespic.twitter.com/YGpHYUTUTS— Jason Schreier (@jasonschreier)December 10, 2020
I knew Cyberpunk 2077 was going to be glitchy but I did not expect my entire game to be covered with tiny treespic.twitter.com/YGpHYUTUTS
— Jason Schreier (@jasonschreier)December 10, 2020
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There are a few visual glitcheslike textures and objects randomly popping in and outthat players say these updates have fixed, too, so they’re a good place to start if you’re struggling with graphics at all.
Nvidia and AMD cannot help with your disappearing dick, though. Multiple players have reported that after spending so much time carefully crafting the perfect peen,it’s not appearing when they look at themselves in the mirror. One guy seems to think he may have accidentally given himself a vagina, butother players suggest there’s an issue with V’s apartment mirror, because they’ve been turned into Ken dolls. However, don’t panic too soon, V’s junk is still there (albeit invisible) andsaving and reloadingmight make it reappear.
(Vampire junk isn’t the only mirror problem, either. Gazing into it while wearing a hatwill make both the hat and your hair vanish.)
A disappearing dick might sound pretty good to the players who’ve found their V just won’t put it away. Some folks are findingV is baring it all during cutscenes, while others are, uh, flying low?
Best#Cyberpunkglitch so far, absolutely flawless 10/10pic.twitter.com/xzgAH1uHYw— FISK (@FiskyBizniz)December 9, 2020
Best#Cyberpunkglitch so far, absolutely flawless 10/10pic.twitter.com/xzgAH1uHYw
— FISK (@FiskyBizniz)December 9, 2020
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Best first glitch for Cyberpunk 2077 so farpic.twitter.com/VCenQzWv1a— Bipper (@PipperBipper)December 10, 2020
Best first glitch for Cyberpunk 2077 so farpic.twitter.com/VCenQzWv1a
— Bipper (@PipperBipper)December 10, 2020
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Up next, one Reddit user seems to have found some in-game advertisements advising CD Projekt Red on what to do with their game.“Chelinchan24” posted these screenshotsof some ads on Night City’s highway. When you’re driving around, the signs say “DEBUG”, but when you open photo mode they actually appear as they’re meant to be.
Will never progress in Cyberpunk 2077 because I can’t stop watching every single driver slowly crash into this one barricade and then yell at me about itpic.twitter.com/AqE5wbCsvT— Chris Livingston (@clivingston)December 10, 2020To see this content please enable targeting cookies.Manage cookie settings
Will never progress in Cyberpunk 2077 because I can’t stop watching every single driver slowly crash into this one barricade and then yell at me about itpic.twitter.com/AqE5wbCsvT— Chris Livingston (@clivingston)December 10, 2020
Will never progress in Cyberpunk 2077 because I can’t stop watching every single driver slowly crash into this one barricade and then yell at me about itpic.twitter.com/AqE5wbCsvT
It’s not a surprise that a brand new open-world RPG has bugs, though this is alot. I know Cyberpunk 2077 was already delayed multiple times, but I feel like this bad boy could’ve stayed in the ovenjusta bit longer.
The game has already had a day-one patch to deal withsome of the issues reviewers experienced before launch, though the devs were very vague on what exactly that fixed. I expect (or hope) that more fixes are on the way, but CDPR have yet to make any sort of statement on it all.
The only thing they have addressed is thatthey’ve accidentally left a copyrighted song in the gamethat could play even if you have the “Disable Copyrighted Music” option on. They’re working on a fix, but don’t say exactly when it’ll come.
For now, you can find some technical support over onCDPR’s website. Alternatively, head over tothe official forum(which is currently having a bit of a meltdown),GOG’s forum,Steam’s discussions, orthe bug report threadon the Cyberpunk 2077 subreddit to see if other players are having similar issues to yours.
If you’re playing throughGOG Galaxyand it crashes when loading, try thisCyberpunk startup crash fix.
Of course, Cyberpunk 2077 is more than just its bugs. We’ll have a review up on RPS soon to tell you all about it.
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